Today's Kitchen

Today's Kitchen

Stories of Afternoon

Characters

Courier Ethan Gummy Matterhorn SilverAsh Vulcan Procurement Agent

Backgrounds

1 2

“

Matterhorn obeys SilverAsh's instructions, staying home alone to prepare Cliffheart's lunch. Matterhorn also prepares a portion for Ethan, who often comes by to scavenge, but does not expect Ethan to come bearing a surprise for him as well.

”

<Background 1>
9:50 AM \ Sunny Rhodes Island Landship, Compartment 2, Cafeteria
Matterhorn	North Kjerag-style stir-fried greens, sprinkled with a little Rhodes Island Special Seasoning.... And we're done.
Gummy	Wow! Looks delicious!
Matterhorn	You flatter me. Such leafy greens are rare in Kjerag, so I don't often get to cook dishes like this. Your approval brings me joy. Things are different in the snowfields of Kjerag. Many goods are hard to come by, even with money. It's not like here on this landship, where supplies are so plentiful.
Gummy	Supplies.... I think I heard Closure say something about that. I guess Rhodes Island has like a special procurement channel that brings supplies and stuff to the ship. They have bases all over the place, so we can get all kinds of different ingredients from different places.
Matterhorn	That explains it. But they really have bases all over?
Gummy	Um... I guess they're like offices or something? I don't really get this stuff. That reminds me, wasn't there a wishlist on the bulletin board outside the cafeteria? If there's anything special you like to eat, you can write it up there! I heard those pretty girls in procurement check it every day!
Procurement Agent A	You're too sweet, Gummy! Call me pretty again and I'll bring you back some candy next time.
Gummy	You're gorgeous!
Procurement Agent A	Atta-girl.
Procurement Agent B	Seriously...? Matterhorn, right? Just make a note of whatever you need on that bulletin board there and we'll procure it for you, if we get the chance.
Matterhorn	I understand. I'll make use of it if I find myself in need. Your efforts humble me.
Procurement Agent B	No need to go that far. This is our job, after all.
Procurement Agent A	What's with the stiffness? We're all friends here. Loosen up and talk like human beings already.
Procurement Agent B	You need to take our work more seriously! Don't mind her. We have things to do, so we'll get out of your hair for now.
[The procurement agents leave.]
Gummy	Hehe. Everybody's so nice. Last time we moored by a city, Closure even took me shopping with her! The stuff she bought was kinda weird.... But I still had fun!
Matterhorn	Haha, I heard about that. Dr. Kal'tsit was very upset when she bought a big stone mask?
Gummy	Ahahahaha. Yeah! That mask was so creepy! I tried it on once.
Matterhorn	Next time you see something so strange, perhaps you shouldn't touch it. Ah, the food has cooled down and the temperature is perfect. Mm. It's salty. This flavor may be a little bit much...
Gummy	Don't worry, I'm sure it's great. Do you think I could try some? Can I? Please let me have some, Uncle Matterhorn!
Matterhorn	U– uncle...? (Am I that old now...?) Of course you can. In fact, it would be a big help to me if you were my taste tester.
Gummy	Hooray! Hehehe, c'mon, lemme try... Oh?
Matterhorn	Huh? What's wrong?
Gummy	Um.... Hm. I kinda feel like there's less food on this plate than there was a second ago? So weird. Am I going crazy...?
Matterhorn	.......
Gummy	Oh well. Gimme a bite! Ommmm—nom. (chewing and munching)
Matterhorn	How... how is it?
Gummy	Omnom nomnom. Gulp. It's great!! The veggies are crunchy and juicy and super refreshing and seasoned juuust right. It's really, really good!
Matterhorn	O– oh? I appreciate the compliment. But I think you're exaggerating a bit. This is a simple recipe designed for home cooking. I can put a copy up in the kitchen for everyone to try.
Gummy	Hooray! I'll also let you try my secret recipe for Ursus frozen vegetable soup, Uncle Matterhorn. It's super healthy! Ooh, it'll be like a trade~
Matterhorn	Sounds delicious. I'll give it a try the next time I'm preparing a midnight snack for the Ladies.
Gummy	Hehehe. I'm sure Pramanix and Cliffheart will love it~
Matterhorn	(The Lady and the Young Lady, hm...?) By the way, Gummy, shouldn't you send along that stew you've been preparing? It's for the Doctor, isn't it? It will get cold if we leave it any longer, and that will affect the taste.... won't it?
Gummy	Oooh! I almost forgot!! I better get going! Uncle Matterhorn! The stir-fried greens are mega delicious! Save me the recipe!
[Gummy leaves in a hurry.]
Matterhorn	What a vivacious little girl. ........ ........ Show yourself.
[...]
Matterhorn	........No? Hmph. Then, you'll have to pardon me—
[Matterhorn slashes an empty space near him...]
???	Oof! Come on, man. Are we really up to blades and guns now? Where did you pull that out of anyway? And what's it doing in the kitchen? You could hurt somebody. *Sigh* How'd you know I was here? I thought I was pretty well hidden.
[...forcing Ethan, who were hiding with his chameleon camouflage all the time, to reveal himself.]
Ethan	(biting apple)
Matterhorn	....You. Stealing food from the kitchen again? There's no need for that. If you're hungry, just go to the cafeteria. Did you not learn your lesson last time? I recall a logistics operator telling you if you were caught using your powers to take food or ingredients without permission again, you would be punished appropriately.
Ethan	Punishment? Oh, you mean the one where they make me wear a sign that says "I took food from the kitchen"? What kind of punishment is that? I thought they were joking. Hey, wait a minute, you still didn't tell me how you found me.
Matterhorn	If you hadn't swiped some of the dish I just made, I wouldn't have noticed your presence.
Ethan	Ahhh, I blew it. I was just going to see if there were any breakfast leftovers I could eat, but that stuff you made smelled so good I couldn't resist. Sorry, so sorry. Infinitely sorry. More sorry than sorry can be. You don't care that much, do you?
Matterhorn	I care.
Ethan	Phew, that's a relief, I th... Huh? Wait a minute? What did you just say? Huh?
Matterhorn	I said I care.
Ethan	....... Woah, woah, woah. (No way, this could be bad.) (If he's gonna get stuck in on this thing, this is a problem that could go places!)
Matterhorn	You....
Ethan	Ah, huh? What?
Matterhorn	—You didn't use a fork. You grabbed the food with your hands. And you didn't even wash them! That's unsanitary! It's unacceptable!
Ethan	........Huh? So that's... all you care about?
Matterhorn	Hygiene is no laughing matter! Show respect to your food, especially when it's handmade. Every serving of this dish contains a piece of my heart! Wait, you washed that apple first, didn't you? You need to take care of yourself, as a warrior!
Ethan	All right, all right, I get it.
Matterhorn	That's the same attitude Instructor Dobermann is always getting upset about. ...Anyway, I shouldn't be butting my horns in there.
Ethan	Come on, I'm really turning over a new leaf here. It's just that, hey, sometimes old habits die hard. And it's the kind of thing I never got to worry about. But you got one thing wrong. I did remember to wash my hands this time.
Matterhorn	Just splashing water over them for a second doesn't count as washing your hands.
Ethan	You're a real hardass, man. Okay, whatever, I'll remember next time.
Matterhorn	Frivolous little... Oh, by the way, how did you find the dish you just tasted?
Ethan	Dish? You mean the stir-fried greens? Didn't that Gummy girl already stroke your ego? Need a quick tug from me too? Sure, fine. It blew me away, incredible flavor. And your biceps are huge.
Matterhorn	Any additional glib remarks?
Ethan	Oh yeah, tons.
Matterhorn	Save them. I'm not sure how much longer I can hold myself back from educating you.
Ethan	Hahaha. Seriously, do you really want to hear the truth?
Matterhorn	.......?
Ethan	All right. I'll give it to you straight. The dish is good, it's tasty. But, how do I put this? I get a confusing feeling when I eat it.
Matterhorn	Don't talk nonsense. My cooking isn't capable of sparking such feelings.
Ethan	Gee, you're really no fun at all. But sure. You know, I saw you sigh a few times while you were cooking.
Matterhorn	.......
Ethan	Like full on. You were spacing out, and sighing to yourself. It's hard to imagine you put out food this good in a state like that.
Matterhorn	I....
Ethan	Stop, stop. Forget it, man, don't force it if you don't want to. I don't care at all, really. I dunno what's bothering you. But just some advice from ol' Ethan, take a look at the big picture, and don't do this to yourself.
Matterhorn	.......
Ethan	Look at me. There was me, back there, but I'm over that. Can't do anything about it anyway, might as well not think about it. Life at Rhodes Island is good. Hey, changing the subject, I just wanna ask, what's cooking in your pot over there? Smells really good.
Matterhorn	........That's braised beastmeat. It's ready to go. I'm about to sprinkle some cheese on it. It's a traditional Kjerag dish. Snowlanders all grow up eating it. I've made some slight adjustments to make the beastmeat more tender.
Ethan	Oh! That sounds awesome! Can I try this too?
Matterhorn	Wait, not that, that's—
<Flashback starts here>
<Background 2>
??? (SilverAsh)	Here you are, Matterhorn.
Matterhorn	Master! When did you get to Rhodes Island? And why didn't you inform me you were coming? Just a moment, I'll make you some tea.
SilverAsh	No need, I'm only passing through.
Courier	It's just a matter of talking to the Doctor about some Kjerag issues. It all came up pretty suddenly, so I didn't have time to tell you. There is a lot of pressure. The Master is pushing himself too hard.
Matterhorn	I see...
SilverAsh	Setting that aside, Matterhorn, how is Ensia these days?
Matterhorn	The Young Lady is in good spirits and her condition is under control. As you instructed, Courier and I have been keeping an eye on the Lady's health. I prepare a separate lunch for her, to avoid any adverse reactions to Rhodes Island's food.
SilverAsh	That's good. Heat up another pot of salted milk tea while you're at it, Ensia always liked that.
Courier	Your tastes haven't changed, nor have hers, Master.
Matterhorn	As you wish, Master.
SilverAsh	Well, that's that. Thank you.
<Flashback ends here>
<Background 1>
Matterhorn	I prepared that specially for the Young Lady, at the Master's command. I'll be bringing it to her later. If you're still hungry, I can prepare something else for you.
Ethan	Yeah, that'd be great. I really wanna get some of that tender meat.
Matterhorn	It's very precious food. Specially requested from operators who were passing by that base. This is all we have.<r/>Not to mention, braised meat takes a tremendous amount of time. You'll just have to make do with regular fried beastmeat.
Ethan	This is discrimination!
Matterhorn	Beggars can't be choosers!
Ethan	Fine! I'll earn the good stuff!
<Background fades out and in>
Ethan	....... That Master you're talking about, he's your boss, right? That's Master SilverAsh who pops up every now and then to chat up the Doctor?
Matterhorn	That's right. You've met the Master? Whether you have or not, I advise you to take a more respectful tone.
Ethan	I called him "Master," is that not respectful enough? Anyway, that boss of yours, I heard he's got a couple of younger sisters?
Matterhorn	Yes. What of them?
Ethan	That Feline girl named Ensia, she's your "Young Lady," isn't she? Real sweet of her brother to send you along to feed her home cooking. He worried the foreign stuff won't agree with her? So that's the "Young Lady." Where's the "Old Lady?"
Matterhorn	...What exactly are you asking? The matter of the Ladies is the Master's private affair. You'd best not ask such questions.
Ethan	Whew, that's a scary face. Chill, I'm not dumb enough to go sticking my nose into rich people business.
Matterhorn	So....? Ah, pass that sauce bottle over there for me.
Ethan	This one? Here you go.
Matterhorn	Thanks.
Ethan	Welcome. Ooh, that's starting to smell good.
<Background fades out and in>
Matterhorn	And we're done. It's just plain fried beastmeat. But I made a few substitutions. It should taste all right. There's bread in the basket over there, and there should be rice in the pot next to it. You can have whatever you like. I need to bring this to the Young Lady now. Remember to wash your hands before you eat.
Ethan	Get outta here. Are you my mother?
Matterhorn	No. Thankfully, I'm not.
[Matterhorn leaves.]
Ethan	...Yeah, get going. *Sigh*. Too bad. That braised meat smelled amazing. ....... Guess I'll wash my hands. Weird. Since when am I such a good boy?
[...]
Ethan	Okay, do the soap, the thirty seconds on each hand.... Three, two, one. And we're good. (shaking out his hands) Safe.
??? (Vulcan)	At least wipe your hands before you grab the bread.
Ethan	Huh? Who's that?
??? (Vulcan)	...Nobody. Just a blacksmith. Hm? Where's Matterhorn?
<Background black>
???	Thanks, Matterhorn, for the tea. Mmm, it smells good. Is there some sesame oil in it? That's how I used to take it when I was little. I can't believe you still remember.
Matterhorn	You humble me, my Lady. Now then, I'll leave you to enjoy it. I must be off.
<Background 2>
Matterhorn	........ (It must have been the Master who put the sesame oil in the tea for her when she was small.) (But the Master hasn't had salted milk tea like this since he came back from Victoria. He must have forgotten.) (My Lady...) *Sigh*. (The Young Lady picked out all the peppers again this time. She's been doing that since she was small.) (If you keep being so picky with your food, you won't get a balanced diet. Things will only get worse...) ...Hmm? That reminds me, the Master would, in such cases.... ........ (No, don't go down that road.) (It's too dangerous an issue. Better just forget about it.)
???	Hey, hey, hey, big guy—
Matterhorn	Hm? Who's there?
Ethan	It's me! You see something floating down the corridor, who else could it be?! You stupid? Whatever. Here, take this. Don't drop it.
Matterhorn	What's—
Ethan	There you go. I got a thing. Later.
Matterhorn	Wait!
[Ethan runs off.]
Matterhorn	........He's gone. What is he doing? It's a... sandwich? He burned the bread, didn't cut the edges, and sliced the scalesaur meat too thick, it's...
??? (Vulcan)	Cut him a break.
[Vulcan appears.]
Vulcan	He worked hard on it. Even put in some tangerine slices. It should taste fine.
Matterhorn	........Vulcan. You must be here for my shield. I left it with a few other pieces that need fixing in the kitchen. I'll fetch them for you.
Vulcan	It's okay, I'll go with. That guy was pretty chatty while working on that sandwich.
Matterhorn	Did Ethan say something unpleasant to you? Let me apologize on his behalf. He speaks without thinking, but there's no malice in him....
Vulcan	Err, no. Slow down there. It's nothing like that. He said he wanted to give Uncle Matterhorn a taste of "aimless youth cuisine," as a token of appreciation. I guess he put his heart into it. Oh and he walked off with two plates of food that were sitting in the kitchen.
Matterhorn	........ What nonsense. Such hooliganism.
Vulcan	It is. But why do I get the sense that you kinda like it?
Matterhorn	That's ridiculous.
Vulcan	Look me in the eye and say that.
Matterhorn	Ahem.
<Background black>
Matterhorn	........By the way, how old is Ethan? Where does he get off calling me "Uncle?"